Inner Critic Mindfulness
Good Morning. Today’s Mindfulness practice focuses on the inner critic. I have been watching a lot of youth tennis these days and I have observed kids literally screaming out loud to themselves, “Are you stupid?” “You suck.” Obviously it does not help their concentration or their game. We may not all be that intense, but most people have an internal critical voice that accompanies them throughout their day. There is evidence that self-talk –working a problem out in your head or making encouraging statements like you can do this is helpful. But when the internal dialogue is harsh and critical it actually impedes progress and leads to feelings of guilt and shame. It makes us feel less capable and it results in far less enjoyment of life.
It is a truth that no one is perfect, but our internal reactions often demand perfectionism. We seek resolution of problems instantly and when we slip up, we beat ourselves up.
So today’s practice is designed to help you to focus more on the process of realizing your goals than evaluating where you are or how far away you are form reaching them.
To begin, sit and take a few breaths to get centered. Now reflect on something you would like to achieve. It can be a big life goal or it can just be your to—do list for today. Notice any feelings that arise when you think of this objective. Do you get fearful of failure? Or resentful of your own chosen goals? Are you tired before you start? What does your inner critic say? Breathe in and get to know this voice. Recognize it. Just breathe. Realize that your inner critic is perhaps a bit extreme. Continue to breathe and cultivate a sense of humor about your inner critic…try not to take yourself so seriously. When you have a harsh thought, recognize this inner voice and decide that your goal is to finish the race, not to come in first. Strive to be a c-student in this endeavor. Breathe a little more focusing on what a gentle or funny inner dialogue would feel like instead of a demanding and rigid voice? Breathe in and out 12 times with each exhale telling yourself that you are fine, feeling warmth for yourself.
As you move through your day, notice your inner critical voice. Mindful observation loosens up that critic and allows you to have perspective. When you notice the inner critic operating, try to replace the thoughts with an internal comedian instead. Try to see the irony or humor in the situation. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Just breathe and cultivate an easy manner.
Have an average day!!
Michele
